


proud & painful oath

by frogmango



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Anohana AU, Bittersweet Ending, M/M, she/her pronouns for arashi narukami, this fic revolves around death; non-graphic but still be careful
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-11-24 05:15:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,337
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20902217
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frogmango/pseuds/frogmango
Summary: "Tsukasa Suou believes he must be seeing things. There's no other explanation for the figure of his dead childhood friend standing in front of him."Ten years ago, Knights, a merry band of childhood friends, were suddenly torn apart by the death of their leader. Now, when Tsukasa begins seeing the apparition of Leo, he must return Knights to their former bond so that Leo can pass peacefully on.





	1. I - WITH MY HONESTY

**Author's Note:**

> though this is an anohana AU, you don't need to be familiar with it to read this! all context is provided within the fic. enjoy!

Tsukasa Suou believes he must be seeing things. There is no other explanation for the figure of his dead childhood friend currently looming over him.

It’s been too long. Though there is that initial pang, that instinctual desire to simply reach out and take that hand, _it’s been too long._ It’s been years since he last caught “glimpses” of Leo in every redheaded stranger in a crowd, or in glints of reflected green off of glass or jewels. 

This must be a nightmare, then. It’s also been too long since they were just dreams.

“Leo? No... Begone, foul _demon!_ Ghost of my _imagination!_” he says, scrambling backwards until his back hits the wall. 

“That’s no way to greet your leader, newbie! Did Sena teach you nothing?!” Leo scolds, wagging a finger at him.

It’s so familiar.

“Don’t act so casual!” Tsukasa replies, horrified. “You’re dead!”

“Dead?! I’m not dead! The aliens took me! And now they won’t let me back up until I fulfill some ‘wish’! Seems like baloney to me, but what can you do? Wahaha!” Leo says. “Could a ghost do this?!” He rubs his hand over Tsukasa’s face, nearly poking his junior’s eyes out in the process. Tsukasa wriggles away in protest, biting back a scream.

A nightmare, this has to be, it has to-

“_Leader_, stop that! I-” 

“Got your nose!” Leo interrupts, pulling his hand away with his thumb between his fingers. “Could a ghost steal your nose? I don’t think so!” 

Tsukasa takes a deep breath, attempting to fully process the situation. “Please… If it’s really you…” 

Fool. How many times will he do this? How many times will he fall for his mind’s same trick?

Leo sighs, then pulls away from Tsukasa. “Suo. It’s me. I’m right here.”

After a few seconds, Tsukasa exhales, and slowly outstretches a hand to cup Leo’s face.

But it’s different, this time. It doesn’t fade away at his touch, or contort into that horrible scene from back then. He’s just firm, soft, _real._

He pinches himself. Then, he smacks himself across both cheeks. Leo watches, nonplussed.

“Newbie, what are you-”

“I can’t believe it,” he says softly. “_Leader_… It really is you.” _How? Why? Who cares?_After a moment’s hesitation, he shifts his position to a kneel, crossing an arm over his chest. “Welcome back… King of Knights.” His heart swells at the words. How long had it been since he’d said them last?

Leo grins triumphantly. “Now _that’s_ a greeting.” 

Having at least somewhat recovered from his initial shock, Tsukasa takes a moment to examine Leo. He’s undeniably Leo Tsukinaga, recognizable by his lion’s mane of orange hair and those striking green eyes. But he’s certainly not the same Leo that Tsukasa last saw alive; he seems to have aged as much as the rest of them. 

He still isn’t entirely sure this is happening. He doesn’t even know what to say. What _do_ you say to your childhood best friend when he’s been dead for ten years?

There’s only one thing he _can_ say.

“_Leader_… I’m so sorry.” 

Leo just looks back at him quizzically. “Why? What do you have to be sorry for?” 

Tsukasa’s heart aches. “I couldn’t save you. I - Knights are supposed to protect their king. But none of us did,” he says. 

Leo just laughs, and it’s a sound so familiar it pulls Tsukasa’s heart apart. “Newbie, don’t you know the story of Humpty Dumpty? All the king’s horses and all the king’s men-”

“Stop!” Tsukasa yells, covering his ears with his hands. It’s too soon, still too soon for anyone to joke like that - even if it’s Leo himself. Horrible images of that day flash through his mind; the precipice over the river, Leo tumbling, orange hair face down in the water -

He hugs his knees to his chest and buries his face in them, breathing shallowly. 

He hears a rustling sound, and he tenses as Leo throws a blanket over him. He raises his head slowly, just in time to see Leo crawl into the makeshift fort next to him.

“A base away from base,” Leo says, clicking on a flashlight. Tsukasa has no idea where he got it from, but he’s not about to question it. Leo always had a way to conjure up the right things at the right time, and it seems it’s a habit he’d kept even after death. “Now! Listen carefully to me, Suo. Unless you’re going to invent a time machine and kill Newton so he can’t invent gravity, there’s nothing you could have done!”

Tsukasa can’t help but snort at the absurdity of that statement. Leo grins triumphantly. 

“That’s more like it!” he says. “That’s the Suo I know and love!” 

“But _Leader_-”

“No buts!” Leo interrupts. His voice turns serious. “Listen to me, Suo. We were kids! We could barely tie our own shoes! Accidents happen. And there’s no changing things now, so don’t let it bother you!”

“How can you expect me to be unbothered by your death?!” Tsukasa says. “You were our king. We should have done something more.”

Leo flicks the flashlight on and off rapidly before shining it straight into Tsukasa’s face. “No more of that talk!” he says, waving it away. “That’s an order from your king. Now, a lot of abductees don’t know what the aliens want from them in order to get beamed back up, but I’m smarter than all of them!” He puts both hands on his hips triumphantly. “They want to hear a Knights concert! Of course, who could blame them? Nobody can put on a show like we can!” 

_"One, two, three!" At the end of Leo's countdown, they all open their mouths and begin to sing. They've scarcely gotten two notes out when Leo begins waving his hands frantically._

_"No no no!" he exclaims, stomping his foot. "You guys are completely out of tune! You've got to sing together! As a unit! As Knights!" _

_"Leader, it isn't Knights without you. Maybe you should sing with us?" Tsukasa suggests. _

_Izumi nods. “Kasa-kun’s right. You wrote the song, it doesn’t make sense for you not to sing,” he says._

_“Maybe with Ousama’s voice to lead us, we’ll sound better!” Arashi chimes in, clapping their hands together. “Please Ousama, won’t you join us?”_

_Leo sighs. “You all drive a hard bargain! Alright, this time I’ll sing too! One, two, three-”_

_Their voices ring out melodic this time, Leo’s gentle soprano resonating throughout the walls of their base. Tsukasa’s heart swells with pride as he sings. This was them. This was Knights._

That _was_ Knights. Then, they were united, in name and in heart, and it felt like nothing in the world could defeat them. But he had been right back then. Without Leo to unite them, their harmony fell apart.

“_Leader_… Knights aren’t what we once were,” Tsukasa says softly. “Ritsu-senpai, Narukami-senpai, Sena-senpai… I haven’t spoken to any of them in several years.” 

For a few moments, Leo’s face is unreadable. Tsukasa feels the weight of guilt on his shoulders; of course this isn’t what their leader wanted for them. He should have tried harder, not let Leo’s death tear them apart, but ten years ago the wounds had been too raw, and today they’re too buried and forgotten. 

Does he really believe that, or is he just making excuses?

Leo finally breaks the silence. “Well then, there’s no time like the present!” he says, his face back to its chipper self. “Tomorrow let’s go see Rittsu! He’s always home, isn’t he? I’m sure he’ll be happy to see me! Wahahaha!”

The statement makes Tsukasa wonder. “_Leader_… Do you think everyone will be able to see you?” he asks. That wasn’t how ghosts usually worked - which was a confusing thing to think of in the first place - but Leo _had_ said he wasn’t a ghost. Then again, it was hard to tell how seriously to take Leo sometimes, especially on a subject like this.

“Ooh, good question! Where’s your mom?!” he asks. Without waiting for an answer, he jumps to his feet, pulling the blanket off of them both and throwing open the door to Tsukasa’s room. “Mrs. Suou!” he yells at the top of his lungs. “Mrs. Suou!” 

Tsukasa winces at the volume. If his mother were able to hear Leo, she would have surely responded by now. “I suppose that answers our _question_,” he muses. “Why me then, I suppose?”

Leo tilts his head at him quizzically. “Because Suo’s special, of course,” he says.

“I’m afraid I don’t know what you mean, _Leader_. If anything, I would have thought you’d appear to Sena-senpai,” Tsukasa says. “I always thought you were closest to him out of any of us.” There's no resentment behind the words - or none Leo would be able to detect, at any rate.

“Why indeed!” Leo responds with a laugh. “I suppose the aliens work in mysterious ways! Wahaha!” 

Tsukasa sighs. It doesn’t seem he’ll get a straight answer from Leo right now - assuming Leo actually knew anything in the first place. 

“It’s late,” he says. “I’ll contact Ritsu-senpai tomorrow, so for now we should rest.” 

He’s scarcely gotten the words out when Leo does a flying leap onto Tsukasa’s bed, collapsing face-down in the middle of the mattress. “I call this bunk!” he yells, his voice muffled by the blankets. 

“_Leader_, this is a queen bed,” Tsukasa says, pointing out the obvious. “There is no ‘_bunk_’.”

“Then you’ll just have to come sleep next to me!” Leo exclaims, rolling over. Tsukasa stares at him, unsure how to communicate the fact that sleeping next to his dead childhood friend would be extremely unnerving. Make no mistake - there were plenty of nights when all he wished for was to be curled up next to Leo once more, but it’s quite a different matter in reality. 

And still, he crawls under the blankets with Leo, shoving him to the side so there’d be room for both of them. 

“Leader, _we’re going to get in trouble!” Tsukasa blubbers, tears at the corners of his eyes. His parents were going to kill him! They must be worried sick! He’s the heir for the Suou family, he can’t just disappear in the middle of the night!_

_“That’s the point of an adventure, newbie!” Leo says with a laugh, tugging Tsukasa’s hand. He sniffles as they stumble up the hill, rubbing his eyes with his free hand. It’s cold, he’s tired, he wants to be in his bed-_

_The thoughts all disappear when he sees the view Leo has brought him to. The sky is dotted with millions of stars, more than he’d ever seen in his life. The view from his bedroom is nothing like this. _

_Leo turns towards him with a radiant smile, and Tsukasa can’t help but beam back. All his worries have been forgotten, and the only thing that exists now is the two of them and that endless sky. _

He glances out the window at the moon, and he can’t help but wonder where his former compatriots might be now - and what they would think when he brings them this news. He has to admit, though he's not looking forward to attempting to explain the specter of their former leader appearing to him, the prospect of seeing his friends again fills him with warmth. He's not quite naive enough to believe that nothing will have changed, and that they'll be able to go back to the way they once were, but a piece of him hopes that they’ll be able to create something new. He’ll cling onto that hope for now, and hope that his sincerity gets through to them.


	2. II - NOCTURNE AT MIDNIGHT

Ritsu Sakuma is awake, despite his best efforts. The incessant ringing of his doorbell, coupled with that cockroach’s apparent unwillingness to do anything about it, forces him to throw on some pants and trod downstairs.

Throwing the door open, he scowls at his persistent caller. “What-” he begins, but stops mid sentence upon seeing who is at his doorstep. Now there’s a face he hadn’t seen in a while. Not that he hadn’t wanted to but… After Leo, it just didn’t happen.

“Eh? It’s Suou… I kind of want to call Anija and tell him there’s an annoying guy outside,” Ritsu says, staring at Tsukasa through bleary eyes. Tsukasa seems to want to protest, but restrains himself. How very like him.

Instead, he bows lightly. “Pardon my intrusion. I have an unusual _situation_ I could use your assistance with. Though I know it is presumptuous to ask for favors, I was hoping you might indulge an old friend,” he says.

Tsukasa was here to ask _him_ for a favor? Surely he remembers Ritsu’s favorite pastime is doing nothing… He doesn’t seem to be budging, so Ritsu stares blankly for a few more seconds before sighing and holding the door open. “Come in,” he says with a light yawn. “There’s tomato juice… It’s Anija’s, so please drink it.” 

Tsukasa politely declines - not that Ritsu had expected him to accept. He really just likes offering his brother’s food to guests. He begins walking to the dining room table, only to realize Tsukasa isn’t following - instead, he’s staring at empty air in the hallway. He raises an eyebrow.

"Suuuuchaaan~,” he says, waving a hand in front of Tsukasa’s face. “Did a batty eat your brains?”

Tsukasa blinks. "Ah… My apologies, Ritsu-senpai. I was lost in thought," he replies, composing himself. 

A hunch strikes Ritsu. Rei would call it something annoying like a ‘vampire sense’, but Ritsu would rather think it’s just being observant. "Mm. It wouldn't happen to be about Ousama, r~ight~?" he asks. 

Tsukasa stares at him, mouth agape. “How did you know?” he asks, taken aback.

“Suuchan has that sparkly look in his eyes~ It’s the look you used to get around Ousama,” Ritsu replies with a shrug, sliding into a chair by the table. That, and it was nearing the ten year anniversary of the accident. It was bound to be on everyone’s minds -- it certainly was on his. 

Tsukasa follows suit. “Ritsu-senpai, I must be blunt. Do you believe in _ghosts?_” he asks, folding his hands onto the table in front of them. 

Now _that’s_ an interesting question. Ritsu’s life was intrinsically tied to the supernatural; from birth, he’d known he wasn’t normal, and that he never could be. If something like him could exist, ghosts certainly weren’t outside the realm of possibility. Still, it was a strange thing for someone as rational as Tsukasa to ask, unless… 

“Eh… Are you saying you’re being haunted by Ousama?” Ritsu leans forward with his chin in his hands, raising an eyebrow. “Isn’t that kind of wishful thinking?”

Tsukasa sighs. “At this point, I almost wish it were. He is as _wild_ as he was ten years ago,” he says. 

“Well, Anija probably knows more about these things than I do…” Ritsu muses, twirling a strand of hair around his finger. “I mean… Don’t ghosts usually haunt people they’re mad at? What did Suuchan do~?”

“I didn’t do anything!” Tsukasa replies, affronted. “According to _Leader_, he has a _wish_ that is unfulfilled, and he can’t return to wherever he came from until it’s done.” 

Ritsu is about to respond, but he’s interrupted by an exasperated sigh from Tsukasa.

“_Leader,_ by now it should be obvious that only I can see you. Please calm down,” he says, rubbing his temple. 

Ritsu claps his hands together. Now things were getting intriguing. If nothing else, Tsukasa certainly seems to believe that Leo is at his side - and not just metaphorically. 

“Ooh, are you saying Ousama is here right now? Should I bow, like old times?” Ritsu says, a playful grin spreading across his face.

“He’d like that,” Tsukasa says simply. In response, Ritsu rises from his chair, crossing an arm over his chest and bowing deeply. 

“Hi again, Ousama~” he says, warmth spreading through his chest. Tsukasa rises as well, crossing the room to stand next to Ritsu. He also bows, hand over his heart. “Always your faithful Knights, _Leader._” he says.

_“Rittsu,” Leo says, lying face up with his head hanging over the edge of the loft. “How come you’re always off on your own?”_

_Ritsu blinks one eye open, looking up at Leo from his nap perch on the roundtable. “Eh? What are you talking about, Ousama? I’m here with Knights right now, right?” _

_“That’s not what I mean! It’s like your head’s in the sky with someone else,” Leo replies._

_“Well, it’s not my fault,” Ritsu says defensively. “Ousama is always running off to strange places. Sometimes he takes Secchan or Suuchan, but he never takes me. So instead of worrying about that, I’d rather think of Maa-kun.” He huffs. _

_Leo blinks at him, and Ritsu is surprised to see that he looks almost… guilty. _

_“Nngah! I’ve failed in my kingly duties! Forgive me, Rittsu!” he says, rolling over and sliding off the ledge. “I didn’t mean it. You’re as important to me as Sena or Suo! The same goes for Naru! Failure, I’ve failed!” Leo clutches his chest dramatically before draping himself over Ritsu’s back. Ritsu gives an annoyed huff._

_“I’ll write you a song. I can already hear it! Something for you to listen to when I’m off on kingly duties! I don’t want Rittsu to ever feel lonely again! Wahahaha!” Leo says. He blows a raspberry on the back of Ritsu’s neck, and Ritsu jumps, swatting at him wildly._

_“Ousama!” His tone is annoyed, but he can’t help the smile breaking across his face._

Ritsu remembers the words now.

_Even if you can’t hear me, I’m right here. Because even if I can’t reach you, we’re always together, connected by the pale blue moon._

“You know, Suuchan, even if that wasn’t real, it was nice~” Ritsu says lightly. “It’s almost like playing pretend, like how we used to. Naru and Sena never want to play anymore, so I guess I was surprised to see you~”

“Please, senpai, you must believe me. I would not bother you were it not an important matter. I believe _Leader_ will not be able to move on if we do not help him,” Tsukasa protests. Ritsu hadn’t meant it like that; he believes Tsukasa whole-heartedly. All he meant was that even if Leo _weren’t_ by their side, it would still be worthwhile to honor him. Or… something like that. He’s still not awake enough to formulate thoughts like that, so he decides to tease Tsukasa instead.

“Well, I guess it wouldn’t hurt to keep playing a little while longer,” he says, chin in his hands. “Are you going to talk to Naru and Sena too?”

Tsukasa sighs. “I’d like to. Narukami-senpai is one thing, but Sena-senpai… We did not part on good terms. We both said things we shouldn’t have,” he says.

“Mm. Well, I’m sure you already know, but they’re both modeling now… You might have a hard time getting a hold of them,” Ritsu replies.

“We both go to the same school, do we not? I’m sure I can track them down with enough _effort,_” Tsukasa says, brow furrowing.

Ritsu gives a small laugh. That is exactly the Tsukasa he knew. “You’re so earnest, Suuchan. You haven’t changed a bit~. I’m not gonna stop you, but I think it’ll be harder than you think,” he says.

Tsukasa is silent for a few moments, and Ritsu raises an eyebrow. Oh no.

“Don’t tell me you want _my_ help talking to them,” he says. “I don’t think they want to talk to me either.”

“Please,” Tsukasa says quietly, “I am prepared to beg if I must. Do you remember the _oath_ we took?”

Ritsu stares back at him, silent. Then he sighs, and nods back. “Alright. Suuchan, you’re a big boy now~. Ousama must be proud,” he says.

“I certainly hope so.” Tsukasa replies.

_And with luck,_ Ritsu thinks, _maybe he’d be proud of me too. _


	3. III - JEWEL STONE

Arashi Narukami loves hard working boys. Some boys though, work a bit _too_ hard. She shifts her weight uncomfortably under the gaze of two of her classmates. 

One of them looms over her accusingly. “Why Sena-senpai lets someone like you hang around him is beyond me.”

So very boorish. Truly, why is it always the most handsome ones that have the nastiest personalities?

The other sneers at her disdainfully, and Arashi has to fight the urge to smack the grin off his face. “Does he know you’re-”

“Oi.” Izumi’s voice rings out, low but clear. Arashi isn’t sure when he appeared behind her, but she’s not about to complain. 

“S-Sena-senpai!” one of the guys stammers, taken aback. 

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” Izumi says, the warning clear in his voice. 

They share a look before running off in a different direction. Arashi’s heart skips.

“My knight in shining armor~” she says playfully (as if they wouldn't have been the ones in danger if they'd finished that sentence), wrapping her hands around Izumi’s arm. She receives a light roll of the eyes in return. 

“I told you not to walk home alone,” he says.

“What kind of a big sister would I be if I caused trouble for you!” she says with a gentle wave of the hand. “Really, though I’m flattered you’d escort me around, I can protect myself!”

“I’m older than you. And you can, but you won’t,” Izumi says.

Arashi huffs. “Don’t be so sure of that. You should have seen how I scared off some boys who were bothering Tetora-kun!” 

“Nagumo can also take care of himself. Really, Naru-kun, you need to look out for yourself more. Imagine if something happened to your face? You know people like us can’t risk that.” Izumi scolds her, slipping his arm free from her grip. Arashi gives him a disappointed look.

“Well, you’re not wrong,” she says with a small sigh. “But really, I should hope you’d care about more than my face by now!” She’s teasing, of course, but some tiny part of her hopes for a genuine answer.

Izumi just gives her a blank, slightly irked look, and that tiny hope dies away. She doesn’t let her smile falter, and simply waves her hand once more. “Oh, no matter. Speaking of, did I tell you about the last shoot where…” 

She fills the empty air with her words, knowing full well that Izumi isn’t listening. Anything to make these small walks slightly less awkward, anything to make her feel like less of a burden and obligation.

She knows that after dropping her off, he’ll return to his home and ignore her texts again - or, if she's lucky, he might send an emoji or single word back. He'll look into the sky if he’s in a good mood, count the stars he sees and whisper names, and none of them will be hers. And if he’s not, he’ll slam his balcony door with the same force he uses whenever anyone else speaks Leo’s name. 

Izumi Sena misses Leo Tsukinaga. Arashi Narukami misses Izumi Sena. 

This intersection is normally where they’d part, her house just down the street and Izumi continuing to their right, but she’s surprised by him stopping suddenly in his tracks.

“Izumi-chan?” she asks, peering into the darkness in front of them. Two figures step out from the shadows and into the streetlight, and she’s shocked to see two people she hasn’t spoken to in a long time.

“Ritsu. Suou,” Izumi says, his voice low. His whole body is tense, and Arashi almost feels like he’s about to attack them. 

“Izumi-senpai,” Tsukasa begins, bowing. “I know we were angry when we last parted. Understandably, we were upset and-”

“Cut the crap,” Izumi interjects. “Tell me what you want or leave.”

“Secchan-” Ritsu begins, but Tsukasa raises a hand to silence him. 

“Then I will be _blunt._ I have _Leader_ here with me, and he needs all of our help to pass on.”

Izumi lunges forward, and Arashi is barely able to pull him back in time to stop his fist from crashing into Tsukasa’s jaw. Tsukasa steps backwards, a look of hurt on his face that breaks Arashi’s heart. No matter the years of silence between them, she still thinks of him as a little brother. 

“I told you this was a bad idea, Suuchan,” Ritsu says, shifting uncomfortably. Izumi’s head whirls towards him, and Ritsu winces under the weight of his accusatory gaze.

“You’re going along with this?!” Izumi yells, still struggling against Arashi’s vice grip. “What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“Izumi-chan, please!” Arashi protests, wrapping her arms around him tighter. She usually hates her strength, but right now she’s thankful for it. She can’t bear to see them like this. What would Leo think… What would Leo say? 

_“Ne, Naru,” Leo says, legs swinging wildly from his perch on the loft of their base. Arashi looks up. It’s unusual for Leo to be early to their meetings, and even more unusual for him to be awake while they wait for the others. _

_“Yes, Ousama?” they reply, setting down their book and looking at Leo curiously._

_“I’ve decided!” he says, hopping down. “You’re the queen of Knights!”_

_Arashi’s heart flutters. “M-Me?” they ask. “I… I thought you’d want Izumi-chan to be your wife.”_

_Leo laughs. “Silly Naru! Just ‘cause you’re the queen doesn’t make you my wife!” he says. Arashi isn’t sure how that statement should make them feel, but before they can think about it too hard, Leo continues. “Besides! Sena isn’t a maiden, he can’t be a queen! But Naru sure can!”_

_Arashi can’t stop the smile from breaking across their face then. In some ways, Leo was the only one who took them seriously when they talked about wanting to be a girl. They don’t really know how the others feel. It shouldn’t matter to them, but… Will they still want to play together if Arashi changes? _

_Their smile had faded into a frown, and before they knew it, Leo was pulling on their cheeks._

_“Ousama!” they protest, reaching up to grab Leo’s hands._

_“Hey!” he says, taking their hands and grinning. “What did we say about frowning? Try smiling! Because that smile is-”_

_“My greatest jewelstone,” they finish, smiling up at him. “Thank you, Ousama.” _

_“Whenever you don’t know what to do, just sing with all your heart! That solves everything!” Leo says, laughing. “Wahahaha!”_

Arashi opens her eyes now as Tsukasa and Izumi argue. “Stop it!” she yells out, more confidently than she feels. To her surprise, they actually listen, and Izumi even slackens in her grip. 

“Look at us, arguing in the middle of the street! This is no way for Knights to act!” she says. Izumi scowls at her.

“We’re not Knights anymore. We’re just normal people. We were never really Knights anyway. We were just stupid kids playing pretend.” he says. Arashi has to resist the urge to slap him, but it would be hypocritical of her to do so when she had just stopped him from hitting Tsukasa. Instead, she lets him go and rubs her temple.

“How can you dismiss such dear memories like that? I know you’re upset, Izumi-chan, but isn’t it crueler to Ousama to pretend he never existed at all?” she says. Izumi scowls, and Arashi worries for a moment she may have pushed it too far, but then his shoulders slacken.

“Fine. If you don’t want to argue in the street, let’s argue in Naru-kun’s house.” he says, turning on his heel and marching on without another word. Arashi turns towards the others with an apologetic shrug and hurries after him, relieved when Ritsu and Tsukasa follow behind.

Izumi walks ahead, but Arashi trails behind. “I’m sorry about that, Tsukasa-chan…” she says with a sigh. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” 

Tsukasa nods. “Yes. I’m sorry as well. Last time Sena-senpai and I saw each other, it was not a friendly _conversation._ But I have no excuse for having not sought you out. My apologies,” he says.

Arashi shakes her head with a sad smile. “My my, you really are a good boy, aren’t you? Don’t worry about it. After Ousama… Well, we all sort of drifted apart, didn’t we?” Her expression turns serious. “Tsukasa-chan… You’re an honest boy, so I don’t think you’d lie, but are you _certain_ you’ve... encountered Ousama? It isn’t just wishful thinking?”

“That’s what I said,” Ritsu intejects, and Tsukasa sighs. 

“I had the same _dilemma,_” Tsukasa admits, “But I do believe it’s _Leader_ himself. I’ve found him able to affect real objects, and he does seem to have some effect even on those who can’t see him.”

Ritsu nods. “When Suuchan said Ousama was hugging me, I felt a chill go up my spine. It was gross~” he says, grinning. 

Arashi sighs. “I believe you, Tsukasa-chan. You’ve always been the smartest of us… If you think Ousama is here, it must be true," she says. “I’m a bit jealous you can see him, though. Has he… Has he changed at all?”

Tsukasa smiles at her gently. “He has grown like the rest of us, but he is still very much the _Leader_ we knew,” he says. He’s silent for a few moments, then his smile grows wider. “He’s irate that you’ve grown taller than him. We all have.” 

A melancholic warmth fills Arashi’s chest. “That sounds like Ousama alright,” she says with a soft laugh. Her smile fades as her gaze falls on Izumi, still walking ahead on his own. “Tsukasa-chan… I believe you, but Izumi-chan may be harder to convince.” 

Tsukasa’s smile falls as well, his expression turning severe as he nods. “I know. I wish I knew why he is only visible to me. It’s _unfair_ that you cannot all see him as well,” he says. 

Arashi sighs. “Life isn’t usually fair, Tsukasa-chan… If it were, we wouldn’t have lost him in the first place,” she says. 

Having reached the entrance to her home, she steps past an irate Izumi to unlock the door. “Make yourselves at home,” she says. “My parents work late, so don’t worry about noise~.”

She slips off her shoes and steps inside, switching on the lights as she makes her way to the living room. As everyone takes a seat, she notices a seemingly empty armchair squeak, and she can’t help but wonder if it’s Leo or just her mind playing tricks on her.

“Hey, Nyanko,” she coos, wiggling her fingers towards her cat. Nyanko meows before hopping onto the arm of the empty chair. Well, she did always like Leo. 

“_Leader_ says she’s grown up quite nicely,” Tsukasa says with a gentle smile, gesturing toward the purring cat. Izumi clenches his fists again.

“I can’t be the only one who sees how bullshit this is. Are we supposed to believe Ka- Suou is suddenly psychic?” he says. His slip of the tongue doesn’t escape Arashi’s notice, and she finds at least some comfort in the fact that even Izumi can’t stop himself from using their old nicknames. 

“It was not something in me that changed, but rather _Leader’s_ doing. It most likely has to do with the fact that we are approaching the 10th anniversary of the _accident,_” Tsukasa says.

“Then why you?!” Izumi says, jaw clenched. “What makes _you_ so special?! You were barely a member of Knights! You didn’t know Ousama- you didn’t know Leo-kun like we did!”

A horrible, heavy silence hangs in the room. Tsukasa’s breath hitches, and it seems even Izumi can tell he’s crossed a line.

“S-Kasa-kun. I… I didn’t mean it. I-”

Tsukasa takes a deep breath. “It’s true that I joined Knights later than the rest of you. It’s true that I… didn’t get to spend as much time in the company of _Leader_ before he was taken from us… But!” he exclaims, gripping the armrest. “The time I did spend is so _precious_ to me! Every moment I spent with _Leader,_ and every single one of you… They’re the most _free_ I ever felt.” He looks up, eyes damp. “Sena-senpai… Please. Let’s not _repeat_ our same conversation from that day. You were my dear friend too.” 

Izumi looks away, clearly conflicted. “It’s just… Too convenient. Life is too shitty to just give him back like that. There has to be a catch, or it has to be a lie,” he says, avoiding Tsukasa’s eyes. 

“Only Suuchan can see him. And he’s going to leave again,” Ritsu interjects. “What more of a catch do you want?”

Izumi doesn’t respond. Hesitantly, Arashi reaches out to take his hand in hers. He tenses, but to her relief, doesn’t pull away.

“Izumi-chan. Why would Tsukasa-chan want to hurt us? He’s only ever wanted the best for Knights, just like the rest of us,” she says. “And even if… Even if Ousama isn’t actually here, we never really said goodbye. Isn’t this as good a time as any…?”

Izumi swallows roughly. Arashi can tell his pride and stubbornness are fighting his heart right now, but after a few moments, he nods. “Fine,” he says hoarsely. “We’ll do what Suou wants.” 

Relief is evident on both Tsukasa’s and Ritsu’s faces, and Arashi is sure hers must look the same. She gives Izumi’s hand a gentle squeeze. “Izumi-chan… Thank you,” she says.

"And what does Suuchan want?" Ritsu asks, resting his head on the armrest. "Or rather, what does Ousama want?"

Tsukasa folds his hands together. "Simply put: an _encore._ One last performance as Knights," he says. 

Arashi can't help it; she smiles. "That's very much like Ousama," she says softly. "My voice isn't what it used to be, but I'd be happy to sing with you all again." I'm fact, now that the idea is in her head, she can't think of anything in the world she'd rather do. 

"It's been years since any of us have sung," Izumi points out. "I doubt we'll be very in tune." 

"My parents inducted me in singing _lessons_ as I grew. I can pass those _lessons_ onto the rest of you," Tsukasa says. "I believe our former base would be a fitting _location,_ assuming it's still standing." 

"It is," Izumi says. They all turn to look at him, and he scowls. "What? I go up there once a month to make sure no animals are overrunning it. It'd be practically a public safety hazard to leave it unattended."

Nobody buys that explanation, but that's okay. Arashi knows that the only person Izumi really makes excuses for is for himself. 

"Then how about we meet there this Saturday at noon? I can bring us lunch!" Arashi says, clapping her hands together. It's all too easy to fall back into her role as their caretaker, their mediator, the person in charge of making sure everything runs smoothly. It's comforting, in a way, to feel needed again. Wanted, even.

"That is a most _generous_ offer, Narukami-senpai. Thank you," Tsukasa says, smiling gently at her. Arashi beams.

"Oh please, Tsukasa-chan! Just call me Nee-chan~." she says, waving a hand. To her delight, Tsukasa nods. 

"Very well then, Nee-san," he says. Not _quite_ what she had in mind, but she'll certainly take it. "I will bring _dessert,_ so if it is alright with everyone, let's agree to meet Saturday."

They all nod, and having settled the issue, one by one they begin to trickle out of her house. As Tsukasa leaves, Arashi catches him whispering into the empty air besides him, and her heart feels a pang. What would she say to Leo if she could see him again? What apology could possibly be enough?

Izumi is the last one to leave, lingering at her doorway after the other two have left. Arashi patiently waits for him to say what he wants to say.

"Naru-kun…" he begins. Then he shakes his head and sighs. "Nevermind. Forget it." He turns to leave, but Arashi catches his hand before he goes.

"What is it?" she asks. 

"Nothing. Just… Thanks, I guess," he says, not meeting her eyes. He shakes her hand free and steps out the door, giving only a half wave behind his back as he disappears into the darkness of the street. 

Arashi stares at the spot where he stood, her hand still suspended in midair. Slowly, she lowers it, and waves at the darkness even though Izumi certainly can't see her now. "Bye, then," she whispers. 

As she prepares herself for bed, she reflects on the night's events. Part of her still can't believe this is real, and part of her thinks that it doesn't matter if it isn't. Each of them carry Leo in their hearts some way or another, and in that manner, isn't he with all of them? 

She won't waste this chance, not like last time. She'll give her king a proper send-off, the way they - the way _she_ should have back then. She won't flee from her fear and sadness anymore.

She sings into the mirror as she pulls the clips from her hair. "That courage is your greatest jewelstone."


	4. IV - IRONIC BLUE

Every bone in Izumi Sena’s body tells him this is a bad idea. What ever happened to letting sleeping dogs lie? Or in this case, sleeping kings?

Izumi’s parents made sure he was well versed in all sorts of things, including tales of old. Legends of sleeping kings were aplenty, slumbering within mountain tombs waiting for a time of need to awaken.

“Well, Ousama, you took your sweet time,” Izumi mutters under his breath as he climbs up the hill. He can think of at least ten times when he could have used a friend, times when he could have used _Leo_ by his side, but there had been no sign of him then.

So maybe he’s a bit bitter. But if you ask him, he has the right to be.

The sound of voices reaches his ears as he approaches, and he there’s no avoiding the unpleasant taste in his mouth.

There’s definitely reasons he should be happy, so why can’t he be? He has his friends back. Leo is supposedly back. The world is full of color again, but ironically enough, he just feels blue.

_“You’re beautiful.”_

_“Haaah?” Izumi replies, looking up from his stretch, annoyed. “Ousama, don’t say such weird things so suddenly.”_

_“I know I always say weird things. But don’t think this is one of them. You’re beautiful,” he says._

_Izumi has no idea what to respond to that, so he just looks away, the tips of his ears reddening. “If I’m so beautiful, how come you haven’t made me a song? You made one for all the others,” he says accusingly. _

_“Hm, a king shouldn’t pick favorites… But have you heard of saving the best for last?” Leo says with a grin. “I wanted to watch you dance.”_

_“It’s embarrassing. Don’t stare at me like that,” Izumi says, scowling. _

_“Like what?” Leo asks._

_Like you’re in love with me, Izumi thinks. Like I’m someone worth caring about. He shouldn’t delude himself by thinking Leo would love him so much. It was impossible; Leo couldn’t love him. Not as much as he loved Leo._

_“Hm hm hm, a perfect silhouette… Dadadadada, Sharp Relevé,” Leo mutters, scribbling in that damned notebook of his. _

Izumi’s eyes widen. The notebook.

His steps up the hill quicken until he’s at a run, kicking up dirt as he stumbles through the grass and into the base.

“Izumi-chan-” Arashi begins, but she doesn’t get any more out before Izumi pushes past her and jumps onto the loft. Ignoring the murmurs of his companions, he shoves aside hay and random knick-knacks until he finds what he’s looking for: the worn cardboard box with the sharpie label “Treasures”. 

Breathlessly, he climbs down, precious cargo in hands. Returning to the table where the other three are seated, he places it firmly at the center. “Let’s start with these,” he says.

“Secchan is enthusiastic today~” Ritsu says, smiling through sleepy eyes. “It’s cute~”

“Shut up,” Izumi grumbles, opening the box. With a look of distaste, he pulls out his old pair of ballet slippers. “Who the hell put these in there?” he asks. His question is answered when he turns them over and looks at the inner sole. Written in neat marker had been the name ‘Izumi Sena’, but someone had scribbled over the ‘Sena’ and written ‘Tsukinaga’. 

“Very funny, Ousama,” Izumi says, trying to ignore the pang in his chest. He tosses them disdainfully onto the table, but it doesn’t escape his notice that Arashi takes them and neatly folds them up. Even when he’s not honest with his own feelings, she finds a way to see through him. 

No sign of the notebook yet. How much junk was even in here? ...He supposes he shouldn’t really call it junk. Even if the items themselves were worthless, each had a memory of some kind attached to it - memories that were all the more precious now that it would be impossible to make more like them.

Pulling out a stone, he holds it up to the light. It’s translucent and pearlescent, sparkling as he turns it. Before he can say anything, Ritsu snatches it from his grasp and slips it in his pocket.

“What the hell, Kuma-kun?” Izumi asks, irked. Ritsu winks.

“That’s a special treasure between me and Ousama~. Sorry Secchan, but it’s mine,” he says. Arashi leans over curiously. 

“Ritsu-chan, could that be…?” she asks. Ritsu grins in response.

“It’s the gem I’m going to use to propose to Maakun~.” he says happily, resting his head on the table. Izumi resists the urge to roll his eyes. Right. _That_ guy. Well, whatever. The moonstone wouldn’t help him find the notebook.

“_Leader_ wants to know what exactly you’re looking for,” Tsukasa says, peering over Izumi’s shoulder into the box. Izumi frowns and nudges it away.

“Ousama, you’re not clueless. Obviously I’m looking for that stupid notebook of yours,” Izumi says. 

Tsukasa groans, and Izumi knows it can’t be good news.

“According to _Leader,_ the notebook is ‘hidden deep in the mountain’. He seems quite pleased with himself,” Tsukasa says exasperatedly. 

Before Izumi can begin swatting at air in an attempt to smack Leo, he’s distracted by a loud gasp from Arashi. Turning, he sees her pointing at the table, where a notebook lies open. It’s not _the_ notebook, but that’s hardly the point of interest; rather, what’s drawing everyone’s attention is the fact that a pen appears to be moving by itself over the page. A chill runs up Izumi’s spine as what is undoubtedly Leo’s handwriting fades into view.

_What the fuck._

“_Leader,_ you could do that the whole time?!” Tsukasa exclaims. He looks to be close to bursting a blood vessel, and Izumi can’t say he blames him. Some part in him - a part he’d very much like to pull out and strangle - has a strange urge to hug Tsukasa just then.

True to Leo’s nature, the first thing that comes into view is a crude drawing of a flying saucer. It’s beaming up a stick-figure Leo from a winding river. 

“_Jesus Christ,_” Tsukasa mutters. “_Leader,_ that’s very morbid.” 

“Hold on, I don’t think he’s just being weird… Look, it’s a map,” Ritsu points out. Just as he said, Leo is drawing other features of the mountain now: the clearing where they played tag at times, the fallen cherry tree, and of course, their secret base. A confusing series of lines and dots cover the map, and try as he might, Izumi can’t make heads nor tails of them. His friends don’t seem to be faring much better. 

There’s a tearing noise, and the paper detaches itself from the notebook. With a bit of trepidation, Arashi picks up the sheet, holding it up to the light. “Unintelligible. That’s our Ousama~.” she says with a laugh.

“Leader says it’s a challenge,” Tsukasa says, peering over Arashi’s shoulder. “Once we find the notebook, our quest will be complete.” He pauses for a moment, brow furrowing, and Izumi knows he must be trying to decipher some cryptic message from Leo. That was once _his_ job, and though Tsukasa had not intended to usurp him anymore than Leo had intended to leave them, it was the reality they were in - one that made Izumi’s chest ache.

“I believe he… wants us to write lyrics to a new song. According to him, the lyrics will lead us to the starting point in our _quest,_” Tsukasa says at last, rubbing his temple. Right on cue, the pen begins moving on its own once more, scribbling out sheet music faster than anyone other than Leo Tsukinaga could. 

Izumi has some very mixed feelings he’s going to have to unpack later. For now, he picks up the notebook, melodies already filling his head as he reads. It’s undeniably Leo’s work, and he holds the notebook a bit closer to his face in an effort to hide the tears at the corners of his eyes. 

Sniffling, he quickly swipes them away with the back of his wrist and slams the notebook back on the table. If this was the last time they were going to lyric-write for Leo, it needed to be perfect. It needed to prove them worthy of being his Knights. “Well?” he says, trying not to let his voice crack. “What are you idiots waiting for? Let’s get to work.”


	5. FINALE - SILENT OATH (BIRTHDAY OF MUSIC)

Leo Tsukinaga is playing alive.

It’s much like playing dead, you see, except quite different. He simply needs to _pretend_ his loved ones can sense his presence, just _pretend_ that he can comfort them or tease them or sing with them. It’s a tremendously fun game, if you ask him.

If only someone would ask.

\- ♛ -

“_Leader,_ please, I need to finish this assignment. We can discuss Knights afterwards,” Tsukasa says with a sigh.

“Boring, boring!” Leo says, shoving the papers off the table and face-planting onto the surface. “I want the newbie to play with me!”

Tsukasa slams his hands down suddenly. Leo looks up, shocked. “Stop it!” Tsukasa says, voice shaking. “Stop it… I’m not a naturally talented person like _Leader._ That’s why…!” He pauses for a moment, as if to catch his breath. “I can’t let up for even a second! I can’t stop, ever, if I want to be someone you’ll be proud of! I want you to look down and be able to see that I am carrying the name of Knights with _honor!_ How can I do that if I don’t work hard?!”

Leo stares back, nonplussed. “But I’m already proud of you, Suo!”

\- ♛ -

“Did you know vampire bats are pack creatures? Their digestive systems are so strange, if they don’t help each other eat they’ll starve! Wahaha!”

Ritsu doesn’t respond, a response most likely attributed to the fact he can’t hear Leo. Regardless of this and Tsukasa’s disapproving gaze, Leo wraps his arms around Ritsu’s back and rubs his face into his neck. Tsukasa mouths something at him that his mother would surely shove soap in his mouth for, and Ritsu shivers like he’s been dunked in ice water. 

Leo doesn’t care. He just laughs. “You’re far less alone than you think, Rittsu~.”

\- ♛ -

“Naruuu. Stop looking at him. Look at me!”

The glances Arashi sends towards Izumi seem to be escaping his notice, but they certainly weren’t escaping Leo’s. As she watches Izumi and Tsukasa with concern, Leo ruffles her hair. She blinks, reaching up to push it back into place with a huff. Her gaze turns back towards Izumi, and Leo can’t help but laugh.

“Wahaha! Naru, I promise you can do way better~.”

\- ♛ -

“Suo is probably wondering where I’ve gone off to, but I can’t be by his side at all times! The newbie has to grow wings of his own at sometime, wahaha!”

Izumi doesn’t respond, continuing his dusting around the base. Leo walks in circles around him, looking up and down.

“You’ve really kept this place in good shape, huh? I wonder how long you’ve been doing this for! Did you start the very day I flew away?”

Izumi still doesn’t respond. As he pauses for a moment to survey his work, Leo brushes his lips against his forehead. Izumi freezes in place, then shakes his head slightly and continues his work.

“Thanks for always looking out for us, Sena.”

\- ♛ -

“_Leader,_ our lyrics,” Tsukasa says, setting the sheet of paper in front of Leo. It’s covered in various colored inks, notes written in margins, words crossed out and rewritten above, and at the very end, four signatures. One look is enough to tell Leo it’s everything he’d wanted from them.

He’s so proud.

“We already practiced them to hell and back, so you _better_ like them, okay?” Izumi says, wagging a finger. 

Something is changing. He realizes that from the moment he set eyes on the words, his clock had begun to tick. Time to work fast. Fortunately for Leo, he’s a master of last minute improvisation. Quickly, he scribbles instructions onto the back of the paper and shoves it towards the others. Arashi reads it aloud, eyebrow raised.

“What a pain. How are we supposed to find something like this in this whole mountain?” Izumi complains. “It’ll be like looking for a needle in a haystack.”

“Calling it a mountain is kind of an exaggeration. I mean, when we were kids it felt like one, but it’s probably more like a big hill…” Ritsu says, rubbing his eyes. “There’s five of us, so it shouldn’t be that hard.”

“Four!” Leo corrects. “I’ll be waiting for you there when you arrive!” His arm is beginning to feel heavy, and all he can hope is that his Knights won’t question him too hard. He can’t make them watch him leave, not again. Not until everything is ready.

“_Leader_ says he’s not coming.” Tsukasa says, raising an eyebrow. “I suppose that is the point of a _quest._” 

His knights begin quibbling, and it takes all of Leo’s self-control not to scream at them to get moving. After what feels like an eternity, they file out, Tsukasa promising their quick return. 

He doesn’t have long. He reaches into the hidden alcove beneath the loft and pulls out his notebook. With all the strength he has, he begins to quickly write.

\- ♛ → ♞ -

It had taken almost an hour of walking in circles, Ritsu whining about the sun, Arashi fussing over her hair, and Izumi complaining about the weeds for them to reach the clearing Leo had marked for them. Tsukasa looks around fondly. They had spent so many days here. If he closes his eyes, he can almost picture them as they were then: young, alive, free.

_Summer sun beats down on them, and Tsukasa can’t stop an undignified giggle of glee from slipping out his lips as Leo pulls him down the beaten forest path. _

_“Leeeooo, wait up!” Arashi whines, a small hand reaching out to try to catch the end of Tsukasa’s cape as they run. Behind them, Izumi carries a pouting Ritsu on his back, looking none too happy himself. _

_“Ousama. Don’t run off when I can’t come after you,” he complains._

_At the top of the hill they’ve climbed lies the secret castle of Knights. Tsukasa has seen mansions and palaces, homes with more rooms than he has fingers and toes. None of them could begin to compare to the magic of their secret base. _

_Leo skids to a halt in front of the entrance, whirling around and raising a hand, palm out. “Hold it!” he says. “Before entering, each Knight must bow to his king!” _

_Tsukasa is the first to eagerly comply, bowing deeply like he’d been taught since he was old enough to stand. He’s rewarded by Leo’s gentle touch on his shoulder, and he darts past the older boy into their base. Then, changing his mind, he ducks his head out to watch the others come in._

_Arashi is next, bowing in a simple yet elegant curtsy. Leo pats their shoulder and they step through the doorway, settling next to Tsukasa to watch._

_Izumi comes next, Ritsu still on his back. He squats into a bow as well as he can with the other boy on his back, rolling his eyes. Leo seems satisfied, tapping them both on the shoulder before turning around to go in after them. Arashi, Izumi and Ritsu all trail towards the round table in the center of the room, but Tsukasa lingers. Leo flashes him a bright smile and his heart skips, the corners of his mouth pulling up into a wide smile as the older boy takes his hand and pulls him along once more. _

_“Let us begin!” Leo calls out, beaming. “An ensemble of hope!”_

“Over here!” Arashi calls out, pointing at a tree. As they crowd around her, Tsukasa’s eyes catch a box crudely nailed into the trunk. If he hadn’t been looking for it, it would have been almost impossible to spot; the wood blended in perfectly with the rest of the forest.

“When did he get the chance to do this?” Izumi mutters, running his fingers over the box.

“How do we open it?” Ritsu asks, peering over Izumi’s shoulder. “It doesn’t look like it has a lid or anything.”

“Got it,” Izumi says after a few seconds, pressing his thumb into the side. Once he pulls his hand away, Tsukasa catches a brief glimpse of a crudely carved chess knight before the side of the box falls away. Inside lie several wooden chess pieces, dotted with teeth-marks and scribbled notes, and of course, the very item they’d come here for: Leo’s composition book.

Triumphantly, Tsukasa pulls it out, waving it around in the air. “_Leader!_ We’ve completed your _quest!_ You can come out now,” he calls out, eyes scanning the clearing for Leo. After a few moments, he frowns. “_Leader?_” he repeats. Still no response.

He can feel his pulse quickening, and next to him his companions tense.

“Something’s wrong,” Arashi murmurs, but Tsukasa barely hears her as he whirls his head back and forth, desperately searching for any sign of orange amongst the greenery.

“_Leader!_” he yells, voice cracking. “Don’t you dare run away! Not this time! We’ve proven ourselves! You _promised!_” It’s like that day all over again, Arashi’s screams and Ritsu’s blank stare, and Tsukasa is falling all over again. 

“Tsukasa-chan, wait!” Arashi yells. 

Tsukasa doesn’t know when he ran away, but he suddenly realizes he’s knee deep in water. Izumi, Ritsu and Arashi skitter down the embankment, wading into the river next to Tsukasa. Izumi seizes Tsukasa’s wrist suddenly, pulling him close to his chest. Tsukasa stares blankly.

“Don’t you _dare_ do anything like that again. Do you hear me?!” Izumi yells, so loud Tsukasa winces. “Do you think Leo would want you to get hurt?! Do you think any of _us_ want that?!”

Tsukasa’s breaths are shallow, and he can’t help but clutch onto Izumi’s shirt as if it were a lifeline. “_Leader… Leader,_ he’s not here, he said he would be here.”

Izumi takes a deep breath, and Tsukasa can feel the tension in his body. “That guy’s a brat, but he wouldn’t leave without telling us,” he says through gritted teeth. “When he doesn’t show up to a meeting, you just have to yell with all your might. Isn’t that right, Ousama!” The last part he calls out into the woods, voice reverberating through the trees.

“Ousama!” Arashi’s voice rings out, melodic but clear. “Come out! No slacking off!”

“Ousama, I walked in the sun for this!” Even Ritsu’s voice, usually quiet and lazy, resonates loudly next to them. “I’ll bite you if you don’t show up!”

With every ounce of energy he has, Tsukasa pours all his emotions into his next words. Every tender moment, every minute of affection disguised as annoyance, every cherished memory he has with Leo and Knights: he yells them out in this moment.

"Long-awaited _king_ of _Knights!_" Tsukasa yells. "_Leader!_ No… Leo! I, Tsukasa Suou, have just one thing to say to you!” He takes a deep breath. “I love you!" 

As soon as the last word tumbles out his lips, Leo is there on the shore, as bright as the day Tsukasa met him. He hears a series of gasps behind him, and he knows that his compatriots can finally see him too. 

No sooner has he opened his mouth than Arashi comes running forward, cupping Leo's face in both her hands. 

"Ousama…" she says, and then she begins to sob. 

"Your hair has gotten so pretty, Naru!" Leo says, reaching up to ruffle it. "As fitting for the Queen of Knights! You have to look after this bunch after I leave again, okay?" 

Arashi sniffs, dropping her hands down and giving Leo a clumsy twirl before curtsying. "See, Ousama? I'm the maiden I've always wanted to be!" she says with a teary laugh, dress billowing around her as she spins. 

He laughs, clapping theatrically. "You sure are! Be a good mama to Knights."

"I thought that was Sena's job." Before any of them had noticed, Ritsu had slinked his way behind Leo, wrapping his arms around the shorter boy's chest. "I guess... it wasn't play pretend after all~" he says, voice cracking.

Izumi is the last to stumble forward, clasping Leo in a desperate hug. 

"Woah there, Sena!" Leo says with a laugh, wrapping his arms around Izumi as well. "Don't kill me twice!"

Izumi laughs a desperate, slightly maniacal laugh, tears brimming in his eyes as he buries his face into the crook of Leo's neck. "I thought you weren't dead," he says, voice choked. "Aliens, wasn't it?"

"It's a _metaphor,_ Sena!" Leo says, giving Izumi's back several quick pats.

Izumi pulls backward, holding Leo’s face in both his hands. Then, slowly, more tenderly than any of them had ever seen Izumi be, he presses his lips to Leo’s. 

Nobody is surprised.

Tsukasa had thought that when this moment came, he’d feel nothing but pain, envy, sadness. It does hurt, but not for the reason he thought it would.

This was a daydream of what they could have had. If Leo had not been snatched away, these were the moments and touches they might have all shared. He cannot resent Izumi for doing what he himself so dearly wished to.

He takes a step forward, and Izumi breaks away. Tears are sliding down both his and Leo’s cheeks, and Tsukasa can begin to see hints of the setting sun through Leo’s form. They must not have long.

“Kasa-kun-” Izumi begins, but Tsukasa raises a hand gently to stop him.

“It’s okay… Izumi-san. I _understand._” he says. He extends his hand towards Izumi, and after a few moments, he takes it.

“_One more time._” Tsukasa says, kneeling. At his side, Izumi follows suit. Behind them, Arashi and Ritsu kneel as well. “Now, _repeat after me._”

As one, their voices ring out in a melody. No longer are they out of tune; their nights of practice in the secret base, the hours spent poring over lyrics, every moment they spent together working towards this was finally paying off. 

They pour their hearts into every word, their ear splitting Silent Oath. 

Arashi is the first to stand. “I’ll bear it today too…” she sings, taking a step towards Leo and taking his hand in both of hers. 

“The moon reflected in your eyes…” Ritsu follows, wrapping his hands over Arashi’s.

Izumi pulls his hand away from Tsukasa, rising and taking Leo’s other hand in his stead. “The scenery disappearing into dawn…” he sings, extending his other arm towards Tsukasa.

It isn’t until that exact moment that it hits Tsukasa that this will be their last song together. Never again will all five of them be able to sing together as one, nor write lyrics. It’s the last song composed by Leo Tsukinaga that they’ll ever hear. It’s then that he can’t stop his voice from quivering as he sings.

“Time only flows on.” 

He stands shakily, then collapses into Leo, wrapping his arms in a death grip around him. His friends follow his example, all wrapping their arms around Leo. Tears flow down the cheeks of every member, voices quivering as they finish their song.

“Forever only this proud and painful oath.” 

The last note falls from their lips, and it’s just the four of them standing in a circle. 

“Ousama…” Arashi says with a sniffle, burying her face into Ritsu’s shoulder. He wraps an arm around her waist, rubbing her side comfortingly, but even his usually relaxed face is tense and tearstained. Izumi stands with his fists clenched at either side, gritting his teeth as silent sobs wrack his body. Tsukasa can only stare at the empty air where Leo had been, arm half-raised in an attempt to find something - anything - to latch onto. It finds nothing, and falls limp to his side.

“_Leader…_ Thank you.” he whispers, head bowed. He feels a weight on his shoulder, and looks up to see Izumi’s hand there. 

“Kasa-kun…” he says, voice hoarse. “Everyone. Let’s go home.”

Tsukasa swallows and nods, trying in vain not to let any more tears fall. Then, he remembers something.

“The notebook,” he says. The whole time, it had been clenched in his hand, and he had almost forgotten it was there. A quick glance into it is all it takes for his tears to return in full force.

“_Messages,_” he says hoarsely. “One for each of us.”

“...Let’s all stay at my place tonight,” Ritsu says, breaking the silence as all of them watch the sun’s final rays disappear from the sky. “Anija won’t mind. We can… Dunno. But we can do it together.”

Tsukasa’s hand finds Izumi’s, intertwining their fingers and squeezing tightly. The older boy looks at him and nods, and Tsukasa turns towards the other two and manages a shaky smile.

“_Onwards, Knights._”

**Author's Note:**

> if you read every part of this, all i can say from the bottom of my heart is thank you. this is the longest fic i've ever written, and probably the most ambitious AU i've ever tackled. if you enjoyed it (or it made you cry), please consider leaving a comment below! any feedback at all means the world. 
> 
> i also wanted to say thanks to alex, lev, liz and otto for looking this over for me and providing invaluable feedback or supporting me as i write! you guys rule <3
> 
> thanks again for reading!


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